A little Valentines Day recap with a recipe on the side.

Some call Valentines Day "the Hallmark" holiday, and I get it.

But honestly I have fond memories of waking up and finding little chocolates and notes of love from my parents.

So in the ways of always wanting to creating memories my kiddies, we celebrate for them.

Hubs and I not so much.

The aftermath of the v-day loot, honestly not sure what I did before Target $1 bins...

And of course my Bug had to be decked out in hearts.

And then there is this kid...

He is coming more and more out of that baby shell and taking on the role of BOY each and everyday.

Like for instance when I was standing in the kitchen and he decided to chuck Lighting McQueen at his sister and gave her a fat lip last night.

Dude you are lucky you are this cute...

After a day filled with junk I made a yummy heart healthy dinner. I had pinned this recipe for Corn and Quinoa salad and was excited to try it last night. To go along with it I grilled up some lemon chicken.

For the chicken:

- chicken cutlets

- juice from one lemon

- poultry seasoning {I use Adobo}

- shallot {chopped}

- 1 tbsp extra light olive oil

Season the chicken with the poultry seasoning. Then place in a large zip loc bag with all the other ingredients. Seal and then with a jar light pound out chicken, this is something I always do, helps make the chicken tender and juicy. Let marinate for about 30 mins. Then using my grill pan over med high heat I grill for 6 per side. Served with the salad on a bed of spinach, it was DELICIOUS and a healthy dinner for my fam bam.

Hope you Valentines Day was filled with lots of love...

A strawberry pickin we will go....

Saturday was one of those days, that as a Mom I knew was good for memories.

It was a crisp morning, clear blue skies, and plenty of strawberries ready for pickin.

Bug, Bean, and I met up with our friends Sara and Lilly, for what Lilly calls "strawbellies".

It had rained most the day and night before, which made for some fun muddy puddles.

Lilly will be a new big sister come May, so it is super sweet to see her watching Avery be a big sister.

Nolan thought we should buy some dirt. I think we had about much dirt in his basket as we did strawberries.

We filled three baskets with beautiful ruby red berries, for $7. I love shopping local, supporting small family owned businesses, and eating fresh.

Yep it was a good day for memories...

Ended up making lemon pound cake and making a simple strawberry topping...

Hope your weekend was filled with lovely memories....

_____________________

Oh and before I go, I had a pancake request Sunday.

For Barbie.

Well, three tries and half a box of pancake mix later, she got what some might say is more a like a drag queen Barbie.

Notice that strong manly chin and what seems to be an adams apple?!

She did not care and was all smiles...

finding my place.

I feel like I am living Ground Hogs Day.

You know the movie where Bill Murray wakes up over and over to the same day.

"Phil?! Phil Conor?!"

Thats me.

Waking and doing.

Doing the same things day in and day out.

So while I sit and fold my fifth load of laundry or stand at the sink for the third time that day, my mind starts wondering...

Is this me.

Is this what I am supposed to be doing?

One thing I know for a fact that I am meant to be, is a Mom.

It centers me.

But.

And I truly hate saying this and feeling this way.

There are days where my heart longs for something else.

Dear sweet baby Jesus, I wish they were it and I could move on with the school drop offs, diaper changing, cleaning, and fight negotiations, and feel like I did it.

I did what I was meant to do.

But I am afraid.

I am afraid of resentment.

I am afraid of regret.

I am afraid of the what ifs.

I am afraid of not loving myself.

My kids give me more then I could have ever imagined.

But somehow there is always a feeling of something missing.

Is that something the "real" me?

Will next week I wake up to a new day, of this feeling gone?

Maybe.

It seems to move like the seasons through me.

Always changing.

I know this single post will not bring answers.

But putting it out there maybe it will stir some to the surface.

But in the meantime, I am a back to making enough memories for my kids to last a lifetime.