Thursday, May 10, 2012

Mom in the shot {Marriage Centered Family}

We are around six months out from celebrating 10 years of wedded bliss,
10 years of never fighting, always agreeing, kissing each others booties, and both of us being right.
Hold up, wait minute, thats not right.
Ok so maybe its been 10 years sprinkled with fights, agreeing to disagree, randomly not standing the sight of each other, and neither of us being right around 50% of the time.

But would I change that?
 Because thats what makes us stronger.
We choose to take those moments and grow as a unit.
We do not hold grudges, well maybe there was that one week, but all the others we move on from.

My husband is my best friend.
He is the reason we are a family.
Without him in my life there would be no us.

Its so easy to get in the grind of your everyday and live for your kids.
But we are trying and trying hard to live for our marriage.
Living for our marriage will make not only make us happier, but our kids in turn happier too.
And please do not worry about my kids, they still get PLENTY of attention and lovin.
But for us to carve out the time for each other is important.
For instance this past Saturday, Hubs came to me and said "I am taking you to the movies tomorrow, I already bought the tickets and the kids are going to my Moms."

The fact that he took care of it and said I want to be with YOU, made my heart VERY happy.
I mean I am not sure about you, but I want my husband to WANT to be with me.

Another easy way for us to just be together, is randomly during the week we have couch dates.
Like the other night, I went and got gelatos, while he put the kids to bed.

Then we sat together eating our dessert and watched tv.
It was so nice to just be with him.
And yes it feels good to know that my man is still attracted to me after 12 years of being together.

Here is the deal, I am not sharing to preach our ways.
I am sharing cause maybe you do the same or you are looking for something to work you and your partner.
I realize that ALL marriages are different, just as all individuals are different, and I love embracing differences. 
So please do not feel like by any means I am saying a marriage centered family is the way you should live.
But for us its how we are choosing.
There will be a day that our kids will move out of the house and when that day comes I do not want to turn to my husband and think "who are you?".


A little fun side note, a local boutique Tuni's has hung one of our family photos up in their window for the month as part of their mothers day display!! Pretty cool to walk around the corner and see it!


Linking up with Emily cause its Thursday and thats what I do...


The Popes said...

That family shot is one of my favorites!

Shelly Triolo said...

I had tears in my eyes reading that, so sweet! I love reading your blog, Amy. It always feels so much like my life, just way more photogenic ; )

BriBedell said...

This is so true, although its tough for my husband and I to go on dates alone. He works nights & when he has days off he wants to spend it with me & the kidlets :) we like to go out with our friends and have big dates all together. Our special time is usually after our kids go to bed and we just sit up late and talk. I know someday our children will be big enough to look after themselves and we can have date nights then :) or until I can at least get my new little dude off the boob! Ha!!!!

Cindy said...

Marriages are such a blessing. You clearly see yours as a blessing and gift too. What a beautiful post.

Sara Stoff said...

aaaaaaaaaaaaaand this made me cry. Good job, Amy. Make the pregnant lady cry.

Amy said...

so well said, loved it!! I've been meaning to write my thoughts on marriage, but you just said them, so I might as well just link up to you! ha. :) big hugs girl. xoxo

emily anderson said...

great post, amy! love everything you had to say---and it's always encouraging to see another relationship striving to keep on. even through the hard times.

Patti said...

Having recently become "empty nesters" I look at my husband & say, "yeah baby!" We have been married almost 32 years & he is still the center of my world. We also chose to commit to each other and our family!
Awesome post!

rachael said...

Three cheers for the marriage-centered family.... yes ma'am ;)

Lindsay - Pen & Paint said...

Excellent post. Robbie did the same thing. Told me we were going, made the plans, and we went.
We have has the motto that if our marriage isn't growing and happy them the family will fall apart. It sucks sometimes. It's not easy. A lot of times we say no to things other families do but it's b/c we know it's not best for us. Rock on sister wife.

Brandie said...

Totally LOVE this, Amy. Although Tommy and I have not been fortunate enough to be blessed with children yet, we've talked about this before and believe in a Marriage Centered Family. It is so important, and, as you know, has so many benefits; but I have to say, not that you EVER shy away from anything -Lol, I think it's awesome that you put this out there. This Family Style has been so controversial, and highly criticized. I totally agree that all individuals, and all marriages are different, and we should all embrace these differences, but this is what works for you, and you are sharing it, and I think that's an amazing thing. I feel like it is so important for us to share with each other, learn from each other, and support each other. I LOVE your blog, and I think what you do is fantastic. So, Thank You =)

Jess Judkins said...

This is such a great post! Scott and I have only been married for two years, but believe me they have been the two hardest years of my life. And I get so much slack from people (especially in the local christian community up here) saying that the first few years of marriage should be wedded bliss....bliss? My husband had a motion disorder when we were first married, his legs would randomly give out or he would have spasms to the point where we were in the ER at least twice a month because his blood sugar would drop so low and we couldn't get it up (he is also type one diabetic), we had tons of in law issues and I ended up getting pregnant w a honeymoon baby and that brought up all kinds of issues with my past and being abused. The first two years of marriage were hell. I wanted to run. I was angry that I made the biggest mistake of my life and we had next to nothing for support. SInce I worked at a mega church and scott grew up in one (was the worship leader) people assumed we should have this all together, that we didn't need help although we begged for help, for support, for community. Since we didn't get any, I went into trauma counseling and Scott also sees my counselor after I've seen her for 6 sessions. We recently put more of an effort into date nights (this has been crucial for us because it reminds of who we married, the people that we fell in love with a few years ago) Also I have found a few friends who have encouraged me to press on, that its not always going to be like this. That one day we will have sorted out all the emotional mess and we are going to have a kick awesome marriage, I would rather push through this stuff now than have a marriage that is total bliss that comes crashing at the thought of some sort of trouble that is upon the horizon.

Your marriage encourages me, I love that you put it first and that you two work at it.

Jamie said...

No wonder your babies are always smiling! When mommy and daddy have a stellar relationship, I truly does make the kiddos happy. Yay for centering your family on marriage! I loved what you said about your husband being the reason you're a family. I'm sure he realizes this, but he is one blessed man! I'm irked at my hubby today and this post really put things into perspective. Thanks Amy, for another beautiful post!